Tag Archives: SAC

The Adventure of the Green Iguana

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TALES FROM MY YOUTH: (Author is another Lexican)
The Adventure of the Green Iguana

Now, I’d met Ivan on a couple of occasions – he was a fairly good sized, bright green iguana having a calm, phlegmatic attitude, as do you and I. Never knew exactly what he ate – Eightball suggested on a regular basis that the source of Ivan’s diet was somewhat more sinister than the insect life that abounded up north – but he seemed happy and well-cared for enough, so much so that on occasion we suspected Ivan was indeed a lot happier and well-cared for than Mrs. Eightball and their son. However, that night Eightball looked around the wreckage of his life and came to the conclusion that the only source of love, unquestioning devotion, and comradeship unto the end was Ivan, and Ivan, in unspoken eloquence, would share that end. Or maybe Ivan was just too damned cold to argue, being where we were, but never mind.

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Tales From My Youth –Final Installment

Mark 28 Thermonuclear Bomb

Tales of My Youth – Part 1

Tales of My Youth – Part 2

With Friends Like These…

…I’ll give him this: at this point, A1C Dumbjohn was doing everything according to Hoyle, with just a smidgen of Clint Eastwood thrown in. I had not taken my eyes off the little twerp’s finger – which was ON the trigger, though the safety was on – and I became aware of Captain Space next to me, with his hands in the air. Well, not wanting to be the odd man out, mine went up as well. With that, Dumbjohn motioned us outside and snarled, “Up against the wall!” as he called the SPs and notified them of a Helping Hand, the code at the time – and may still be – for a violation of nuclear security. There were some loud and most definitely urgent squawks overheard on the radio, and we settled down to await the Cavalry. I had been Jacked Up, friends – an incident that at best left an unpleasant taste in one’s mouth and at worst led to one standing tall before Colonels With Much Fruit Salad explaining just why you were such an idiot.

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Tales From My Youth – Part 2

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Tales of My Youth – Part 1
With Friends Like These…

Now, where was I? Oh yes….

It was just a few days before Thanksgiving, and I was eagerly looking forward to the following Wednesday, when I was due to go home and marry Katherine, a beautiful and formidable young Lady from my home town of Cleveland. My future brother in law – a Loader, though I have never held that against him – and a hospital troop were of the party as well, and the three of us were looking forward to a week or so of happiness and comparative quiet.

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Tales From My Youth – Part 1

Shield_Strategic_Air_Command

The following story came from one of the Lexicans on the Facebook page – known as AtlanticCoast. He was a Sgt in an elite branch of the US Air Force – Strategic Air Command – tasked with a very serious duty – the safeguarding of our nuclear weapons. I thought his story was so good  that Lex had to have been laughing somewhere.

With his permission here it is – the first of 3 parts. 

TALES FROM MY YOUTH:
With Friends Like These…

Jacked up (jakt uhp): v., pop. 1: To be arrested, detained, or otherwise taken into custody by United States Air Force Security Police, usually in connection with a violation of nuclear security rules and standards. 2: Something you never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever want to happen to you. 3: Ever.”

Saying that Strategic Air Command was serious about security is a lot like saying Curtis LeMay (Peace Be His Profession Unto Him) was strict – it gets the point across, but unless you were there, you really can’t appreciate it. As it turns out, I was there for six years and believe me…I still appreciate it.

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