It’s funny because it’s true. Sorta.

By lex, on December 15th, 2006

dwas makes the funny at the expense of A-4 pilots. I’m assuming he means people who flew scooters in the fleet. Not us younger types. Anyway:

He was a ragged looking old man who shuffled into the bar that afternoon. Ragged , fat old geezer, walked like he had no feeling left in his peripheral neuropathy diabetic legs, his arthritic hands shook as he took the “Piano Player Wanted” sign from the window and gave it to the bartender.

“I’d like to apply for the job,” Ken said.

The bar-keep wasn’t too sure about this doubtful looking old guy, but it had been awhile since he had a player and business was falling off.

“What do you do?” he asked.

“I used to be an A-4 pilot in the U.S. Navy,” was the answer. Now, really unsure, the bar-keep decided to give him a try…he really needed more business. “The piano is over there…give it a go.”

The old man staggered his way over to the piano and several patrons snickered. But, by the time he was into the third bar of music, every voice was silenced. What followed was a rhapsody of sound and music unlike anyone had ever heard in the bar before. When he finished, there wasn’t a dry eye in the place.

The bartender brought the old guy a beer and said that he sounded really, really good. “What do you call that?” he asked. “It’s called “Drop Your Panties, Baby, We’re Gonna Rock Tonight,” said the old pilot as he took a long pull from the beer. “I got another, “and he began to play again. What followed was a knee-slappin’ hand-clappin’ bit of ragtime that had the place jumping.

People were coming in from the streets to hear this guy play. After he finished, the pilot acknowledged the applause and told the crowd that the song was called “Big Boobs Make My Afterburner Dance.”

He then excused himself as he lurched off to the men’s room. After thinking a bit, the bartender decided to hire the guy, no matter how bad he looked, or what his songs were called.

When the guy came out of the men’s room, the bartender went over to tell him he had the job, but noticed that the old fighter pilot’s fly was undone and his member was hanging out.

He said, “The job is yours, but first I got to ask, do you know your fly is open and your Willy is hanging out?”

“Know it?” the pilot replied, “Hell, I wrote it!”

Which I think is funny.

 

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Filed under Best of Neptunus Lex, by lex, Carroll "Lex" LeFon, Carroll LeFon, Funny Stuff, Humor, Lex

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